Wednesday, July 9, 2008


After analyzing the results of last month’s poll (asking for our members’ favourites among our recurring guests), I decided to give the twins’ brother Jimmy a call. He is a successfuland very well-known soccer player in England. He is a very attractive 29 year old guy who seems to get even more money from posing for centerfolds and aftershave ads than from playing soccer…

When he picked up the phone, he sounded tired. “Yes?”

“Hi, it’s Alex. How are you?”

He yawned audibly. “Do you know what time it is?”

I looked at my watch. “It’s--- Oh, fuck, I’m sorry, I totally forgot about the time difference…”

Jimmy chuckled. “Already americanized, huh?”

I was pretty happy that Jimmy couldn’t see me at the other end of the line, because my facial color resembled the color of a ripe tomato…

“Should I call again tomorrow?” I asked meekly.

“Nah”, Jimmy yawned. “Now I’m awake. So what’s up?”

“Everything’s fine”, I said. “We are getting more and more viewers, the guys are having fun, the balls get busted.”

Jimmy chuckled.

“Last month we asked our members to vote for their favourite guest”, I explained. “And---“

“Oh”, Jimmy interrupted me. “And I’m their top favourite?”

“No”, I confessed.


“Well, Tristan took the top spot. He’s a skater…”

“Oh, I see… But I’m second?”

“Well, no”, I said slowly. “But you are third.”

“Wow”, Jimmy said dryly.

“Well, third place out of ten guys. That’s great”, I tried to comfort him. And I really thought that it was, too.

“If you say so…” Jimmy yawned again. “That’s the news? That’s why you called me?”

“No”, I said quickly. “I wanted to ask you to do another skit for us.”

Jimmy didn’t answer.

“Something along the lines of the ‘Soccer balls’ competition we had some months ago.”

“Sure, why not”, Jimmy said. “But there is a problem. Last time I brought Frank with me, right? Well, we aren’t talking at the moment. It has something to do with a chick. You don’t need to have all the details…”

“No problem at all”, I said. “I already asked Phil. And when he heard that he was gonna compete against you, he immediately said yes.”

“Alright. So it’s another kicking competition?” Jimmy asked.

“Yes. We’ll get some of our models and some guests to lend us their balls. You are gonna kick them as hard as you can. And the guys are going to rate your kicks.”

“Why not. Any rule changes?”

“I haven’t decided yet. Maybe there will be a few differences. We’ll see”, I said.

“Okay. Call me when you have a date, okay?”

“Sure”, I said. “Thanks.”

“No problem. But don’t call me in the middle of the night any more, okay?”

“Sure”, I said. “Good night.”


So Jimmy and Phil are going to put their skills to the test by kicking some of our models in the nuts. Do you have any preferences? Anyone who you’d like to see in the line-up? And – to up the ante – I was thinking about a “loser gets fucked” addition to the rules.
What do you think?


Anonymous said...

I LOVE IT! SOCCER BALLS WAS ALWAYS MY FAVORITE!!! This would be awsome, another "soccer balls", but with Phil instead, I CAN'T WAIT! although "loser gets fucked" seems sort of turn-off.

Anonymous said...

Honestly? I think it'd be interesting to see one of the twins in this one. They seem to be good at taking kicks. =p

Also, perhaps the addition of one of the two people who ranked higher than Jimmy to the lineup would add a tiny bit of jealousy into the equation?

Alex said...

@ anon:
Thanks for your feedback! I hope the sequel will be on par with the original story. I'll give my best... About the "loser gets fucked" thing: I haven't made my mind up, yet. Maybe I'll ditch that idea... Do you have a suggestion for an alternative punishment for the loser?

@ anonymous:
Okay, the twins are in. The two people that ranked higher than Jimmy in the poll are Tristan and Zach and I guess they'll both agree to take part in the game... :-)) Thanks for your suggestions!

Oh, and another question: Who do you want to be the winner? Jimmy or Phil?

Anonymous said...

hmm, who should win, thats a tough, I guess Jimmy hasn't had his spot in the limelight for some time, so it'd make sense if he won, and the Jealausly concept is hot, hopefully Cal and Brandon will have been casted by then, and will help take kicks.

Alex said...

Thanks for your suggestions! Cal and Brandon will be there along with Zach, Tristan and the twins!

Anonymous said...

awsome new setlist, like Soccer Balls 2, The New Generation, lol, LOVE IT!

Carter said...

God I love these competition stories, great job with it.

Alex said...

Thanks for your feedback! I'm glad you like the story!