Stoners, boners, beats and balls (Pete and Mike meet Leo)

Special thanks to Pete for the idea for this story! If you (yes, I mean you, the one who enjoys a smoke now and then!) would like to meet the Ballbusting Boys and see yourself in a story please read this post for more details.

Artwork created by Champ

Featured in this story: Leo (click for pictures)

The room was filled with the sweet, unmistakable scent of pot, dubstep music was blaring from the speakers, and a video game was running on the large TV screen.

Two guys were playing on the couch, one was sitting in the chair, smoking a joint.

Mike was 20 years old, a thin, lanky, tall young man with dark blond hair and an impish smile on his face, was working the controller like a pro.

“Take that, you fucker!” he announced triumphantly as he delivered another critical hit to his opponent on the screen.

His best friend Pete was as old as him, 20, just as tall but not quite as skinny. His hair was black, and he looked like he hadn’t shaved in a couple of days.

Pete had been away for a year, attending college, and he enjoyed being back home, smoking pot, listening to music, playing video games, and goofing around with his buddies like in the good old days.

Leo was one year younger than them, with curly black hair and a lanky frame. His skateboard was leaning against the chair as he took a puff from the joint.

“Fuck yeah, take that, you fucker”, Pete chimed in cheerfully and punched Mike in the nuts with his fist.



Mike blinked. Then he let out an exaggerated groan. “My fucking kids”, he moaned as he covered his crotch, causing his buddies to burst out laughing.

“No fucking kids for you, dude”, Leo chuckled.

“God”, Mike groaned. “You hit me right in the fucking spunk bunks, man!”

Pete didn’t seem to take his buddy’s indictment too seriously. He just ignored him and focused on the video game, easily winning this round since Mike was too busy cradling his spunk bunks.

“Fuck, that’s unfair, man”, Mike protested but Pete just grinned and shrugged his shoulders.

Mike rolled his eyes and delivered a swift hit to Pete’s most precious possessions with his game controller, causing Pete to gasp and groan as Leo snorted with laughter.

Pete doubled over and curled up in a ball while his friends were laughing riotously.

“Serves you right, dude”, Leo chuckled, offering Pete the joint after taking another deep hit.

Pete was in too much pain to take it, though, so Mike and Leo took a couple of puffs while Pete recovered from the blow to his manhood.

After what seemed like an eternity, Pete was ready to continue playing.

As the video game re-started on the screen, Mike glanced at his buddy. “You okay?”

Pete grimaced. “My fucking nuts hurt like hell. But other than that I’m okay.”

Leo laughed.

“Seriously, though, man, what the fuck happened to your nuts?” Mike said with a grin. “I mean, you’re away for one year, and now you are like…” His voice trailed off as he took another deep drag from the joint. He exhaled slowly, watching the smoke rise from his mouth.

“Like what?” Pete asked.

The deep voice of the video game narrator announced that Pete had lost another round.

“Shitty gamer, scruffy beard, pot belly, weak balls”, Leo said matter-of-factly.

“The fuck?!” Pete blinked.

“Shitty gamer, scruffy beard, pot belly, weak balls”, Mike repeated. “Yeah, that about sums it up.”

Pete let out an incredulous laugh. “But I---”

Mike interrupted him by smacking him in the nuts with the game controller, eliciting a surprised yelp and an anguished groan.

“You were saying?” Mike grinned.

Pete was cupping his crotch, mumbling something unintelligible.

“What was that?” Leo chuckled.

“You are wrong”, Pete repeated, louder this time. “You are dead-wrong, and I’ll prove it to you.”

“Yeah?” Mike grinned.

“Yeah!” Pete said.

“How?” Mike asked with an amused expression on his face.

Pete blinked.

“How’s this?” Leo said with a grin. “You two play against each other once more time. And if you lose, you’ll let him hit you in the nuts as often as he likes.”

Pete swallowed.

“Sounds fair, doesn’t it?” Mike grinned and held out his hand. “Deal?”

“Deal”, Pete mumbled, shaking his friend’s hand.

Naturally, Pete lost the game, and Leo and Mike cheered and laughed, mocking their friend and teasing him as he looked crestfallen.

“See what has become of you?” Mike said with a sigh.

“Shitty gamer, scruffy beard, pot belly, weak balls”, Leo grinned. “Now that you’ve proved the first part, let’s see how weak your balls have become…”

“Come on”, Pete said with a pleading look in his eyes. “You can’t be serious.”

Mike and Leo looked at him.

“You can’t be serious, man”, Pete turned to Mike. “Come on, man!”

Mike’s face broke into a wide smile. “Nah, I’m just kidding”, he said, raising his fist for a fist bump.

Pete’s face lit up and he raised his fist to meet Mike’s, but suddenly Mike’s fist shot forward, meeting Pete’s knuckles in a painful punch that made Pete yelp in pain and raise his free hand to cover his fist.

“Sorry, not kidding”, Mike said cheerfully and kicked his buddy in the nuts with all the force he could muster. His foot connected with Pete’s tender testicles, ramming them into his body and flattening them like pancakes.

Pete doubled over and let out a strangled yelp that made Mike and Leo laugh out loud.

With a well-placed kick from behind that landed right between Pete’s thighs, Leo brought him to his knees as he screamed in pain.

“Down after two kicks”, Leo laughed. “What a fucking loser!”

“Awww, looks like your balls are weaker than I imagined”, Mike chuckled, grabbing Pete by the hair and smiling down at him before sending his foot crashing into Pete’s crotch.

Pete’s hands were cupping his balls, but Mike’s kick was strong enough to hurt both his hands and his nuts, and Pete’s eyes lost focus as he gasped for breath.

Leo lit another joint and reached for the game controller, starting a new game while Mike threw kick after nut-crunching kick at his buddy’s rapidly swelling balls.

The videogame sound filled the room, mixing with Pete’s wails of agony and his strangled cries for mercy.

“God”, Mike laughed. “You should hear yourself! You’re so pathetic!”

A playful punch to Pete’s head made him land on the ground, flat on his back.

Mike let out a laugh and stepped onto Pete’s stomach, bouncing cheerfully as Pete coughed and groaned in pain.

Now and then, Mike stomped on Pete’s balls, driving his heel into Pete’s manhood and flattening it.

“Hey, Leo, look!” Mike grinned and did a Michael-Jackson-style moonwalk all over Pete’s body.

Leo roared with laughter at the sight of Mike attempting to dance on Pete’s prone body. “That looked like shit!”

“It didn’t!” Mike protested. “Look!”

He did it again, eliciting another round of laughter from Leo and anguished groans and grunts from Pete.

Unfortunately, he almost tripped and managed to regain his balance only by stepping onto Pete’s nuts, shifting his body weight onto his most prized possessions, eliciting a high-pitched squeal from Pete and riotous laughter from Leo.

Mike stepped off of Pete’s body and chuckled. “Sorry, buddy.” He raised his eyebrows as he spotted something between Pete’s thighs. “Hey, is that a boner?”

Before Pete had a chance to respond, Mike stomped down hard onto Pete’s manhood, completely flattening the bulge that he had identified.

“False alarm, sorry”, Mike grinned as Pete screamed from the top of his lungs. “That was just those weak balls of yours. Looks like they are pretty swollen…”

In the meantime, Leo had lost his game, and in a fit of rage, he fired the controller at Pete, hitting him right in the soft spot and eliciting another high-pitched scream.

“Hey, don’t damage the controller”, Mike said. “Damage his nuts instead.”

Leo didn’t need to be told twice.

They took turns kicking Mike in the balls, stomping down on his swollen testicles and grinding them into his body.

After what seemed like an eternity, Mike raised his hand. “Hey, I think he’s got enough…”

Leo nodded, and they helped him up.

Mike grinned “Although…” He didn’t finish. Instead he drove his knee up between Pete’s thighs, crushing his nuggets hard and making Pete’s face turn white as a sheet.

“My nuts”, Pete croaked in a strained voice. “I think you cracked my nuts.”

“Not yet”, Mike laughed. “But I guess now you know why we are so concerned about your weak balls.”

“That looked like it hurt a lot”, Leo chimed in as they helped Pete over to the couch where he sank down, clutching his battered balls.

“The good thing is that you have two friends who care about you”, Mike announced cheerfully.

“That’s right!” Leo grinned and playfully smacked Pete in the nuts.

The light contact with Pete’s sore balls drew an over-dramatic reaction, an anguished wail that made Leo and Mike laugh out laud.

“Chill, dude”, Leo said.

“This summer will be all about your balls”, Mike said with a grin. “We’ll bring those weak balls of yours back to their old self. No matter how painful it is…”

“Trust us, it will be painful”, Leo chimed in.

“…but we’ll do it”, Mike said before reaching between Pete’s legs and grabbing his swollen ball bag. He squeezed it as hard as he could, causing Pete to scream from the top of his lungs. “That’s what friends are for.”

With a chuckle, Mike let go of Pete’s nuts.

Leo threw a bag of weed at him and grinned. “Take this”, he said with a smile. “You’ll need a lot of this…”