Sunday, June 10, 2012


When I woke up the next day, I could still feel the pain in my nuts. I was at my older brother's apartment in Hamburg, taking a break from work. Peter was a few years older than me, and while it was nice to see him again after all those years, it felt a bit awkward. And that awkwardness had slightly increased yesterday, when a couple of stupid accidents led to a lot of nut pain on my side - and quite a bit of embarrassement on Peter's...

I got up and walked into the bathroom. Peter was brushing his teeth.

"Morning", I said.

Peter nodded, toothpaste running out the corner of his mouth.

I pointed to the big orange hairdryer that had slammed into my balls last night. It was sitting on one of the upper shelves. "Nice. You placed do-it-yourself castration tool out of reach, huh?"

Peter blushed and looked at me, a devastated look on his face. Then he gargled with some mouth wash.

I tried to lighten up his mood. "What do you have in store for my nuts today, huh? Why don't we get done with it right away and I let you kick me in the junk a couple of times..."

Peter grimaced with discomfort. "I'm really sorry about... you know... hitting you in the unmentionables..."

I chuckled. "Don't be sorry. Accidents happen..." I pulled down the wasteband of my boxer briefs and looked down at my naked junk. "It's those suckers that I blame - they seem to keep getting in your way all the time..." I grinned. "They are fine. Look at them, no bruises, no scratches - and I even made sure that everything is in working order, if you know what I mean..." I winked at him and made a wanking gesture.

Peter's face turned crimson and he quickly looked away.

"Oh, come on, Peter", I laughed. "I'm just joking."

"I'll make breakfast", Peter mumbled and walked out the door.

I took a shower and got dressed. When I came into the kitchen, Peter had made some coffee. He turned to me and asked, "How would you like your eggs?"

I winced. "Unharmed for today, if that's possible..."

Peter blushed again. "I meant hard-boiled or soft-boiled..."

Somehow it was quite fun making Peter uncomfortable. I knew I shouldn't do it. But I just couldn't pass that one up... I grabbed my junk and pretended to fear for the well-being of my testicles. "Not boiled at all, thank you very much..."

Peter inhaled sharply. "Don't be childish!"

I laughed. "Hard-boiled."

Peter nodded and I sat down at the table.

A few minutes later, we were both eating some rolls with strawberry jam.

"So what are your plans for today?" Peter asked.

"I'm going to meet Lukas", I said. "Remember him? My best mate from school."

Peter nodded, munching on his roll.

"We are going to meet at that cute little café in St. Pauli, the street is called Schanzenblatt, I think. Great cakes and great coffee."

Peter nodded. "Herr Max."

"That's it", I said. "Strange name for a café - but Lukas said it's a great place. Want to join us?"

Peter looked at his watch. "I don't know. I should do our tax returns..."

"Oh come on, it will be fun", I smiled. "The cakes are supposed to be delicious!"

Peter shrugged. "Okay."

Two hours later we walked into the café. Lukas was flirting with one of the waitresses.

He hadn't changed much since I had last seen him: Tall and handsome, with blond hair and horn-rimmed glasses, like a Germanic version of Clark Kent. He had a cute smile and a very attractive voice, and I was pretty sure he was still as popular with the ladies as he used to be when we were in school - and he knew it. Back in school he used to have a different girlfriend every week, and he used to brag about being able to talk any girl into giving him a blow-job within five minutes... He didn't try it on me - but I was pretty sure he would have succeeded...

When he spotted us, his face lightened up. He said something to the waitress that made her giggle childishly. Then he turned to us.

"Hey, Alex!" he said, hugging me. "You look great! How are things?"

I smiled. "Great, I---"

I was interrupted by a friendly nut-tap that revived the pain in my balls. I chuckled and cupped my groin. "Careful, buddy!"

Lukas laughed. In addition to being a well-known casanova, he had also been one of the most proliferous sack tappers in our school. Maybe it was some darkly darwinistic survival-of-the-fittest thing with him, always trying to reduce the competition... Anyway, nobody had been safe from his attacks, although I had been spared most of the time because I was his friend. He had even gotten on of our teachers once. Fortunately, that teacher had been a good sport about it, and Lukas hadn't had to face any repercussions... And apparently, he was still up to his old tricks.

I introduced him to my brother, supressing a chuckle when I saw Peter covering his groin.

Lukas grinned and pretended to aim a punch at Peter's crotch.

Peter's face turned bright red as he quickly turned away.

Lukas laughed. "Nice to see you again!"

We sat down at a table, with Lukas and me sitting next to each other on an old-fashioned couch with green brocade covering and golden appliqué. Peter sat down on a wooden chair that didn't look very comfortable. We ordered some coffee and three pieces of cheese cake that the waitress recommended.

"How are thing going?" I asked.

"Believe it or not", Lukas grinned. "I'm studying biology. Focussing on reproduction. Today I dissected some poor mouse's nuts. Ahhh, science..."

I chuckled. "Sounds interesting."

"Well, it's pretty boring most of the time. But I work with a very cute lab assistant. Daniela. I just call her Double-D..." He laughed.

Peter shifted uncomfortably on his seat.

"So what about you?" Lukas asked. "You are having quite a carreer, huh? I saw you on TV a few weeks ago."

I smiled. "Things are going really well..."

"That show is awesome! I watched every episode. I didn't even know you had something to do with it until I saw that interview with you!" Lukas chuckled. "Well done, buddy!"

"You are doing a TV show?" my brother asked.

I smiled at him. "Yup. It's quite successful."

"You've never seen it?" Lukas said incredulously.

"I don't watch TV", Peter replied sternly.

Lukas looked at me and rolled his eyes.

"I can't believe your brother has never seen the show!" Lukas said, smiling. "He must be the only person on the planet..."

"It's not that big", I said. "But it has quite a following, and we're in talks of doing something similar in South Africa and Australia."

"Wow", Peter said. "That's fantastic! I thought you were just, you know, hanging around after your vacation in America."

I smiled at Peter. He was completely out of the loop. He had never bothered to ask me what I was doing for a living. Neither had the rest of my family. And, frankly, I had never told them, fearing that they wouldn't approve of my work, and trying to avoid endless discussions.

"We don't have to talk about my work", I said. "Let's---"

"What kind of show is it?" Peter asked.

"It's a game show", I said quickly before Lukas had the chance to say something.

Peter nodded. "Nice. There's a lot of money in game shows, I guess..."

I shrugged. "I'm doing okay..."

Lukas grinned. "I'm proud of you, man." He put one arm around me and and grabbed my crotch with his other hand. "It takes some great, big balls to do a show like that!" He squeezed hard, winking at Peter.

I winced. "Thanks", I whispered.

Peter cleared his throat and looked away, taking a sip from his coffee, pretending nothing had happened.

"I can't believe they let you get away with this!" Lukas said, grinning. "All those cocks, all those nuts, all that spunk flying around..."

That made Peter choke on his coffee. He started coughing and we had to wait a moment until he was able to breathe properly again. His face was pale, which was a nice change from his usual blushing in situations like this...

Lukas had an evil smile on his face. I knew that smile. When he had spotted a weakness, he loved to go on and on until he got bored with it.

"Maybe we should talk about that later", I said to Peter.

Peter nodded.

"You really should see the show", Lukas grinned. "Usually, there are two teams with two contestants in each team. They---"

"Lukas", I said. "Please---"

Lukas let his fist sail in between my thighs, connecting perfectly with both of my nuts, knocking the wind out of me and making me groan miserably and double over in pain.

"They compete against each other in a couple of games. And one team member always gets it in the nuts. Usually, by the end of the show, their balls are black and blue, and most of the time, there has been some copious amout of jizz splattered all over the studio", Lukas explained, smiling, as Peter's face changed from white to fire engine red, and I was trying to recover my breath. "I remember the show with---"

"Lukas", I groaned. "Let's just---"

Lukas chuckled and pinched my earlobe. When I raised my hands protectively, he drove another fist into my balls, making me howl in pain.

The rest of the patrons turned their heads, puzzled expressions on their faces. I doubled over and looked at the floor once again, moaning in pain and holding on to my jewels. Lukas glanced at me, chuckling. Peter seemed to be the only one in the room who didn't know where to look...

"My favourite show", Lukas continued, "was the one with the Czech team and the French team. The Czechs were pretty good, two hunks with balls of steel. They took their punishment really well. But the French guys - oh, man..." He laughed. "They were going on and on about their 'couilles' and their 'noisettes'. One of them shot three loads in one game. It was like they crushed the spunk out of his babymakers with a juicer. I almost thought they'd pop a nut."

Peter looked like he was about to faint.

"Don't worry", Lukas said, grinning at Peter and patting my back. "They didn't pop that poor guy's balls. But they sure did a number on them. They were literally black and blue when the show ended. And the best thing was that the Czech guys won. Those poor French bastards got their danglers ruined for nothing..."

I groaned and looked at Peter. Judging from the expression on his face, he was ready to throw up.

"I hope you are proud of your brother", Lukas smiled at Peter. "He killed two birds with one stone: He spared the world from having to endure some more posh French kiddies running around - and he provided us with some excellent entertainment..."

Peter stared at us. All of a sudden, he got up, mumbled something about having to do his tax returns and left the café.

"Fuck you, Lukas", I groaned, rubbing my crotch.

Lukas laughed. "Sorry man, but that was just awesome! Did you see his face?" He chuckled. "Priceless." He patted my back again. "How are your nuts?"

I moaned in pain.

Lukas looked over to the waitress. "You know what? I'll let you nurse your nuts while I get me a nice, little blowjob..." He stood and winked at me. "Won't take long..." He disappeared with the waitress into the backroom.

I groaned and rubbed my sore balls. Damn. My relationship to Peter was going to get a bit more complicated...


Darrel L said...


Alex said...

Thank you! :-))

Erik said...

Fun light reading :) Hope he has a suprise for Lucas as well!

Alex said...

Thank you, Erik. I don't know if we'll see Lukas again. Right now, I'm heading in another direction... :-))

Luke said...

What show is it that you do?

Alex said...

Hey Luke, it's a naughty little show called "The Balls of Others" - you can read all about it here on the blog (look at the list of multi-part stories (completed)).

It's highly entertaining and incredibly hot - and unfortunately it's not real... :-))

bbmal said...

Awesome! I like Lukas a lot, and his description of the French/Czech competition makes me hope that someone finds the "lost tape" for that episode... and so many Easter Eggs in this one! I love it! Great job, my friend!!!

Alex said...

Thank you bbmal! I'm glad you like the story. And who knows - maybe I'll find the time to search for the "lost tape" and post it here... :-))