Saturday, April 26, 2008

The Ballbusting Olympics: Danny's interviews 2

Featured in this story: DannyKevPhil and Zach (click for pictures)

On Thursday we had our second day of competition for the Ballbusting Olympics. The teams competed against each other in Roshambo, with Parker winning gold for the gymnasts, Ben winning silver for the jocks, and Leo winning bronze for the skaters. The frat guys continued their losing streak with Zach, whose oversized eggs were crunched viciously.

Danny, the commentator for all the games, did a few interviews right after the matches.

***

“Hi there”, Danny says, smiling into the camera, and holding a microphone. He is standing in front of a large wall with the Ballbusting Olympics logo on it. “This is Danny reporting from the Ballbusting Olympics. Today’s competition is over – and we have a loser.”

The camera zooms out to reveal Zach, the blond hunk from the frat guys’ team, who is standing naked next to Danny, his hands massaging his battered, swollen testicles and his large, limp dong. He grins nervously.

“Hi, Danny”, he says and bites his lip.

“You had a bad day”, Danny says and points at Zach’s mangled equipment.

“Yeah, you could say that”, Zach admits.

“Those big balls didn’t stand a chance against the other teams”, Danny continues.

“Yeah.” Zach is very uncomfortable. He lets go of his balls and scratches his head.

Danny takes the opportunity and grabs Zach’s large orbs in his hand. He squeezes them and grins at Zach, who winces in pain.

“With nuts this large”, Danny says, “I took you for a serious contender for the gold medal…” He gives a hard squeeze and Zach moans in pain. “I mean, they feel alright…” He squeezes hard again, making Zach grimace with pain.



Zach coughs and Danny lets go of his poor balls. He looks at Zach expectantly.

“You know, Danny”, Zach says slowly, cupping his balls and playing with his large dick. “Perhaps I didn’t take the whole competition serious enough…”

“That’s what I heard”, Danny nods.

“Yeah, well, I haven’t been very good at training. Perhaps I thought, you know, with balls like this”, Zach weighs his aching orbs in his hands, “I didn’t need to train…”

“Obviously, that wasn’t too bright”, Danny chuckles. “Your nuts were kicked into a pulp. Perhaps we can see that again.”

A short clip of Zach’s nuts getting cracked by Leo’s bony shin appears on the screen.

“Ouch”, Danny comments.

“Yeah, ouch”, Zach says gloomily.

“So, will you be back again – or is this the end of your career in ballbusting?”

Zach grins weakly. “Well, I’ll be in training for the next week or so, and I’ll be back after that. I don’t want to disappoint our fans…”

Danny smiles. “That’s the right attitude!” He gives Zach’s balls a quick backhanded slap, making the blond frat guy double over and moan. Danny chuckles. “Good luck to you!”

Zach tries to smile through the pain.

Danny laughs. “Thank you, Zach.”

Zach coughs. “Thank you, Danny.”

Cut.

Now Danny is standing next to Phil, the 18 year old English soccer star who serves as the umpire in the matches.

Phil is wearing his umpire’s uniform, black shorts and a black t-shirt.

“I’m standing here with Phil, America’s highest paid new soccer player”, Danny smiles into the camera. “Hi, Phil!”

“Hi, Danny”, Phil smiles brightly.

“How do you like umpiring the games?”

“Well, Danny, it’s certainly different from what I usually do”, Phil grins. “It makes for a nice change now and then.”

“Phil”, Danny says. “you know, I noticed something weird at the beginning of the Roshambo match. BOC president Kev kicked your balls, didn’t he?”

Phil laughs. “Yeah, he did.”

Danny smiles at him expectantly.

“You know, it started kind of as a dare”, Phil explained. “Kev told me he’d kick my nuts on stage and I said he wouldn’t, so, well, basically, he showed me.” He grins. “But I’m gonna get him back…”

“I bet you will”, Danny smileds and looks at Phil’s bulging crotch. “Are they still aching?”

“Nah, they’re okay”, Phil laughs. “He didn’t get them both, just grazed the left one…”

Danny grins and turns to the camera. “Okay, so there is something going on behind---“

He is interrupted by a loud, dull thud and a soft moan followed by a hoarse “Me bollocks!”

The camera zooms out to reveal Phil clutching his groin with Kev laughing his ass off behind him.

Danny laughs. “I bet that kick got both of them, right?”

Phil nods. “Yep.” His face is beet red and he is panting heavily.

Kev grins and walks out of the frame.

“Hey, Kev, wait!” Danny shouts.

Kev joins him and Phil in front of the camera.

Phil groans.

“This is Kev, president of the Ballbusting Olympics Committee, the BOC”, Danny explains.

Kev nods and smiles at Phil who is doubled over and moaning in pain.

“Sorry, bud”, he grins.

Phil grins weakly and rubs his sore crotch. “No harm done.” He shakes Kev’s hand.

Kev’s grin is wiped off his face when Phil punches his balls with a hard, well aimed karate punch.

“Ooohhh”, Kev groans and his eyes cross.

The camera zooms in on his face as the pain settles in. His facial expressions change from disbelief to realization, then to a hint of grief and finally to a wagonload of pain, as he collapses on the ground next to Danny and Phil.

The camera zooms out again.

Danny looks down at Kev, inhaling sharply with sympathy pain.

Phil grins and straightens up. His hands are cupping his crotch but the pain seems to have vanished.

Danny’s eyes are fixed on Kev’s lifeless body on the floor. “You got him”, he says to Phil.

“Yay”, Phil smiles. “And you know what?”

Danny looks at him with a blank expression.

In a quick, fluent motion Phil gets down on one knee and punches Danny’s jeans-clad bulge.

“I got you, too”, Phil grins.

Danny’s cheeks puff and a long, wheezing sound escapes from his lips.

Phil grabs the microphone from Danny’s hand and smiles into the camera. “That’s it for today. Next week we’ll be back with the third day of competition in the Ballbusting Olympics.” He winks into the camera and chuckles.

Fade out.

5 comments:

DePrime said...

ya, alright, Phils awsome, wouldn't mind seeing more of him

Anonymous said...

you know, in the celberaity story, it might make sense if in addition to Danny getting an actor, Jimmy can get David Beckham at the same time

Alex said...

Hi, anonymous! You mean that David Beckham should make an appearance? What do you mean by "celberaity story"? Thanks!

Anonymous said...

I mean the one were voting on right now, it would be cool if David Bechkam was in it too, of corse, i understand if you'd rather not

Alex said...

Thanks! I'll think about that. I don't think I'll have David Beckham in the "Special Guest" story. Perhaps I'll include him in one of the "Ballbusting Olympics" stories.